i go for gold.
after a 12 hour over nite drive i finally made it to melbourne just to find myself half waakw and half asleep to be spit out in the rain at 6 in the morning.amazing start in the day ey...
i don't mind this crazy weathercause hey - it is not the disappointing german rain with those heavy drops dropping in the most unattractive way down my head right into my shirt. it is the australian rain. i can feel it droppimg down my hair, wandering above my skin and playing in a cheekey way with the colours of the nite. cosy the reflections in the puddles as well. in this very moment i am happy and gracefull. you gotta love it!
i made it to the hostel pesto (or he would like to be called: hernan!!!) recommended. the urban central in more or less central location. it's an awesome address for backpackers, new, stylish and with brekkie included. a nice place to start a day strolling along melbourne's river banks, through the streets, roads and squares. soon i will start exploring melbourne. it is supposed to serve australia's best coffee. so expectations are high and i will try my luck to find out about the daily grind. chinatown should also be one of the city's hot spots as it is famous for its affordable but delicious middle east cuisine.
i cannot avoid it. every day i doubt if i'll feel like home when i arrive back in berlin. every day i receive more questions from home. some of the people ask questions, some ask no questions, but one can see that the latter are proud of themselves for their silence; they often say with a wise air that these things cannot be talked about. they plume themselves on it.


i prefer to be alone, so that no one troubles me.
my sister wrote that every time a plane is to be seen from their garden my beloved nephew and his sister tell her that 'pimmi' (that is how they call me...and iy is not funny) is coming back.
i can go no further, i can see them standing right in front of me - waiting, wishing, hoping.
'pimmi is coming back' - sisiter, oh sister.
i lean against the wall and grap my backpack. i hold it as tight as i can, but i cannot take another step forward, things start fading and crashing before my eyes, i clench my teeth fiercely, but i cannot speak a word, my nephew's call has made me powerless, i can do nothing, i struggle to make myself laugh, to speak, but no word comes out, and so i sit in front of the computer, miserable, helpless, numb, paralysed, and against my will some tears run down my cheeks.
so much things i'd like to say, i cannot remember - i cannot say.
i pull myself together, take a deep breath and start in the day melbourne has to offer.
it will be a good day.